Monday, September 17, 2012

7 months!

I know, I know, I went for months not even mentioning the pregnancy on the blog (or pretty much anything at all), and now that's all you get to hear about!  But alas, today we celebrate another major milestone in this journey!

This is certainly cause for celebration! (Or at least a blog post).

I can remember being 7 weeks pregnant. Boy I never want to go back there.  I can remember the first trimester.  It is as they say, your mind forgets how bad it was.  However, I remember it was bad enough to not reminisce about.  The second trimester wasn't too terrible.  We did a lot of traveling to visit family and friends and Alex and I spent a ton of time together.  Now into the third trimester, I have to say this is the greatest I have felt so far!  In fact, month 6 has altogether been amazing! 

My biggest complaint right now: HEARTBURN! Oh the reflux!  To help manage I have been tossing back almonds and papaya enzyme chewables.  Both work, but only some of the time.  Still, I will take it.  So many have told me that in the third trimester they reverted back to symptoms from the first.  Ok, so bring on the heartburn, but please, leave the nausea and exhaustion for someone else!

One symptom that may or may not have to do with pregnancy, and came upon me just yesterday was an incredible amount of anxiety.  From whence it came, and why, I haven't a clue.  But last night it was awful.  Maybe it's just the "7 Month Jitters" driving me crazy.  Perhaps there is some sort of biological reason for it, or maybe I was just being nutty last night.

I considered all the reasons I could be feeling this way.  Could it be work?  Girls on the Run practices begin today and I questioned if that was weighing in on me.  I didn't think so.  Was it the conversation I had with my sister?  Had I over-stepped my bounds?  She assured me I didn't and she appreciated what I had to say.  I didn't think it was that.  Was it because Alex was at class for more than 3 hours and I simply missed him?  Well, he came home, and I still didn't feel better.  I was concerned it had to do with the baby.  Was she kicking enough?  Was I becoming worried something was wrong?  And then thump, thump, she began to wiggle and squirm.

Anxiety is such a weird emotional feeling.  Especially when you can't place the source.  I slept just fine, despite the crazy evening.  And this morning I woke up straight away at 5am.  I decided to jump start the day with cycle class, hoping that if I wore myself out enough the anxiety wouldn't return.  I was already anxious about my anxiousness! 

I am happy to report, I am feeling much more relaxed this morning and at ease.  I still feel so weird about it.  Why did it happen?  Will it come back? 

Has anyone ever experienced anxiety in this way before?  When you can't place the source of your emotion?

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