Thursday, October 27, 2011

Simon Birch and God

I keep telling myself to stop with the crazy talk on the blog.  I must be turning folks away.  No one wants to hear how "God is using me."  I feel like the movie Simon Birch.
This was one of my favorite movies growing up, and one of the few movies I could even stand watching more than once.  The little boy in the film walks around saying God has a purpose for him.  His life is going to be great and that God will use him.  The people in town and at church chastise him, questioning his faith and telling him to shush, no one wants to hear his wild statements!  The church is content to follow their religious rituals and move through every day life not questioning a greater and higher purpose.

I wonder if that's what others think of me.  Are they wanting me to be "normal" and stop talking about God's big plans.  Am I turning others away because I believe God has called me to something greater than the life I am living?  Will I lose friends?  (Have I even been that vocal about it to turn others off, or is it all in my head?)

I am certain that as I continue to follow God's will for my life, my path will change and the people on that path will also change.  Ultimately it is a question of who I wish to follow.  What is most important?  God is obviously most important, and my relationship with Christ.  But that doesn't mean that my other relationships aren't valuable too.  I want to nurture those relationships, even as I change. 

In the end of the story in Simon Birch, the little boy saves the lives of many school children in a terrible accident.  [spoiler alert] It is a deed that ends up taking his own life.  God was working a wonderful power in this small body and many eyes were opened by this little boy and the short life he lived. 

I wonder if that will be my legacy?  Will I be strong enough to save a life, even in the wake of criticism and disapproval?  Will I follow Jesus, or my own selfish desires?

Yesterday I had a "God Moment."  I have struggled with my passion and desire for long term mission, and what I would give up here at home to make that possible.  I'm not just talking about my comfortable couch and food on the table.  I am more concerned with my friendships, and a career that is fulfilling.  Giving up my position at Girls on the Run to move away would be the most difficult thing I could ever be asked to do.  I shared this in a meeting yesterday with my board chair and we both agreed that there might be a different schedule that could work that would allow me to take a break during the summer to pursue some of these passions.  Nothing is official and obviously our two opinions aren't the only ones that count.  But I am blessed to have a "boss" that is a Christian and understands God's will.  It is something we will continue to pray over and I am excited about the possibilities! 

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