As I sometimes do, this morning I was struggling with an internal question: "What is my motivation for creating, and continuing to write this blog?" I wonder if I am leading a good Christian life, and if all this food and health obsession isn't just a distraction from God, and His will for me. I find it difficult to translate my thoughts into words here, but I feel very compelled to write on this topic, and am trying my best to accurately describe the internal conflict. You see, while I know that health is very important to leading a wholesome and productive Christian life, and I truly believe the food I put in my body is 90% responsible for keeping me healthy, I still wonder if I put too much emphasis on the food and my health, and not enough dependence in God. And some days I'm very concerned that who I am portraying on this blog is a glutton instead of a faithful follower of Jesus Christ.
Would I consider myself a glutton? Well no, there are certainly times I act out of a gluttonous sin, but a glutton- I don't think I am. There is more depth to me than just food- I swear! (Or maybe I shouldn't swear here!) But am I showing my readers this? I talk about my God and my faith, but am I showing that my faith comes first? Or am I showing that food comes first? And which am I really putting first on a day-to-day basis? When I examine my priorities, is God still number one? Or has this blog stolen the spotlight? I love writing this blog, and I love that I have readers and an audience. But I need to ensure I am not being a hypocrite, and I need to ensure that I am keeping my priorities in check.
I want to make sure that I am being a good example. Certainly my life isn't perfect, I'm not perfect. But if I am going to put my words out there for all to read, I want to make sure that they are Christ led and inspired.
I toil with these thoughts for the moment. I haven't come to a great conclusion or peace with them. Church this morning helped me to iron out some of the wrinkles in my mind, but this is an ongoing examination, in which I must continue to keep my priorities in check and my motivation aligned with God's will.
Speaking of God's will, what does that mean? In church this morning, Doug said this: "There is no God's will for your life, it is just God's will. Find where God's will is being done and join in. Align yourself with the will."
That got me thinking this morning...I constantly pray "Lord, show me your will." When I am facing a decision--sometimes as simple as where to go on vacation, or should I or shouldn't I go for a run. I think that God has an ultimate purpose for each step I take. But am I forgetting that I am a tool for God? My hands, my feet, my voice- it is all a tool God uses to carry out his plans. And maybe I'm still too focused on the "me" and being selfish. Am I missing the real opportunities around me to be a part of God's will because I'm too concerned with my vacation being part of His will? Instead, I should look to others, what work is being done that I can jump in on, how can I be of service?
As we sink our teeth deeper into Romans each Sunday at church, we are moving away from the story of God's grace and more into our responsibility as people in this world. How do we hold up our end of the bargain? Do we use works to get to heaven? Absolutely, not! But does God expect a level of service out of his followers. Of course! Look at what he has given us! So today in church, Doug pulled 3 teachings out of the scripture below:
Romans 12: 1-2
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will.
1. Offer ourselves in true worship. In the old testament, sacrifices were given for redemption and thanksgiving. Well the ultimate sacrifice has been paid, Jesus died on the cross, so now we must only offer up our praise as an offering of thanksgiving and celebration. When we offer ourselves, we are offering all of us, our spirit and body, together in unison. Doug said, "How we use our bodies is how God works in the world. It is how we give back. We live out God's word in the created world."
2. Allow our thinking to be transformed. All Christians are in danger of being squeezed back into the world's mold and we must question every decision: "Did I make this decision, or did the world make it for me?" God tells us to live in the world, but don't become part of it. I thought it was very interesting how Doug took this argument to mean that we really need to transform our minds through learning. Many Christians believe that spending time in the books (apart from the Bible) is distracting from our faith. Read above about my own insecurity of this blog taking away from my faith. But this is not a biblical thought, Jesus teaches all over in the bible about renewing our minds, not emptying them like Eastern religions believe. To work out God's will in this world, we need to know the world we live in. "You can be smarter," Doug's profound words. This gave me comfort to know that I am not wasting time learning about food systems and public health. Knowledge without zeal is dead, but zeal without knowledge is wildfire. Give that some food for thought.
3. Live the adventure of God's will. And this is where it comes together. If we offer ourselves in true worship and allow our thinking to be transformed we can live the adventure of God's will. Doesn't that sound like fun? An adventure? I don't know about you, but where I see God's will being done, it always looks awesome. It is big, and meaningful and full of glory! I want to be a part of that! That is an adventure that I would like to go on!
I am beginning to think that this is my adventure. I gotta say this blog is fun and pretty awesome and in my mind it is big and meaningful and full of glory! And maybe I have offered myself in thanksgiving to the Lord, and I am allowing my thinking to be transformed as I learn about factory farming, and how food plays an integral role in the development and healing of many illnesses and diseases, and now this blog is my adventure of God's will. Maybe it isn't a distraction at all, but God's tool for reaching people.
That-would-be-really-awesome!
What adventure are you on? How do you see God's will at work in your life?
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