Tuesday, January 12, 2010

I have been feeling so uninspired lately...thus the sporadic posting!  Today is really no different. Even as I type this, I'm still unsure what I'm going to write about.  Maybe today I will tell you about my husband.  He is a great man.  He humors me.  And even when he doesn't "get" me, he still "gets" me.  It is amazing that I get to be in this relationship.  He loves me unconditionally, even when I'm not the easiest person in the world to get along with.  I've been thinking a lot about this marriage thing lately.  Up to now, it really hasn't required a whole lot of work.  We just sorta go about every day life, coexisting side by side.  People say "marriage is a lot of work."  I just never believed it.  These days, I've been in a little rut, and I'm beginning to think that perhaps this is where the work part comes in.  But how does one go about "working" on their relationship. Don't misunderstand, Alex and I are very happy and in love.  But I'm thinking if we start "working" now, maybe we won't ever get to a point where we really need the "work."  Is this all clear?  I'm thinking the place to begin working on my marriage, is to work on myself.  My character.  I had this revelation yesterday, that I may be a selfish person. Weird, huh?  I started considering my motivation for all things, and wondering if even the things I do for others, aren't really for myself somehow.  So this is my new project.  To release this spirit of selfishness and refresh myself with tender-heartedness, kindness, lowliness of mind, meekness and long-suffering.  I will consider my motivation behind each decision I make and pray that it is out of the goodwill of others and not my own selfish gain.  So here is my charge: "When I do things, I will not let selfishness or pride be my guide.  Instead, I will be humble and give more honor to others than myself.  I will not be interested only in my own life, but I will be interested in the lives others."  (Phillipians 2:3-4) So this will be step one in my "work."  I'm also reading and praying through the "Power of a Praying Wife" by Stormie Omartian again.  Just as a daily reminder of what I am to be focused on.  Well thanks for listening to my rambling.  I guess this post was less about my husband than it was myself. Hmmm...do you see a selfish pattern?  Pray for me!

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